Tuesday, April 5, 2011

A Dozen or so Douches

I have this friend (no, really) at work named Woody. Since I am in that hell-hole 50 or 60 hours a week, sometimes we spend time making up new words. Although scholars will tell you that fuck is the must versatile word in the English language, Woody and I are beginning to think that douche is making headway in that department.

Here's some of what we have come up with:

Nouche:  Nerd douche

Gouche:  Geek douche

Envirodouche:  Special name for our Environmental Manager at the plant

Houche:  Hippy douche (I lobbied for hipouche, but he thought it was too much like hippo)

Oldouche and Youche:  You know, old and young douche

I know, we're fucking brilliant.

Oh, race car driver Kyle Busch is forever now known as Kyle Douche. If you know who he is, then you understand. If you don't, take my word for it.

Um, that's only seven. Let's see. There were more, but I drink heavily.

Hey, I'm going to the Cardinals game tomorrow to see Albert Douche-holes. Heh. Eight.

Oh, who's that douche that cries all the time? John Douchener. You know, speaker of the house John Douchener. Cries all the time. Whatever. Nine.

Okay, I said a dozen or so.

Or so.


Tara Tyler said...[Reply to comment]

are you the douchenators?
crazy kids!
Happy D Day =)

Aunt Buckethead said...[Reply to comment]

I love it when you douchecanoodle with the Woodster...

Rae said...[Reply to comment]

I'm totally speechless...
and they give you a paycheck every week?