Oy

Ok, I've spent so much time playing with my layout I just don't feel like posting now.

BTW, thank you Rae. I was trying to figure out what the scary snake thingy was on your blog and I noticed the PYZAM logo. That's when I realized that you weren't coding that page by yourself. I really thought you were some kind of blog designing genius and I was too embarrassed to ask you how you did it. So I googled blogger layouts and now I have a new one!

Where was I? Oh, yeah. I don't feel like posting. I keep resting my head in my hand with my elbow propped up on the desk and then I move a little and this shooting pain-like sensation shoots through my arm and then it jerks (my arm) and sends my head sailing through the air. It feels like it goes a long way, but it probably doesn't. So I stop propping my elbow up but then I forget and do it all over again.

And that's all I really have to post about.

My New Year

OK, I have a strict rule about not blogging after imbibing, but we'll see how it turns out. I only have one reader and she only shows up every few days so I can always delete this if it stinks too bad.

Now that Christmas is over, we are really and truly broke. B. R. O. K. E. Our gas tank is at 40% so it is 60 degrees in my house right now. I have $11 in my bank account. And I am so sick of ham and beans. But thank goodness our neighbor gave us a ham for Christmas!

Tomorrow is my niece's 12th birthday and I had the foresight to buy her present back in the early days of December when I had money. My sister-in-law will feed us lunch, so there is another meal where I won't have to eat ham and beans (hopefully).

It is a New Year so of course I have made the same old resolution to lose weight. Since I have no money that might actually be possible this year!

Oy...this is depressing. You know what? I am going to stop wallowing in this no money nonsense and concentrate on the positive. I am leaving a much smaller carbon footprint! I am going to lose weight! I am going to cut back on my alcohol consumption!

YAY!

James Garfield Part 2

Okay, the funny thing is that people at work actually come to me for help with their computer problems.

I cannot figure out my all-in-one scanner to save my life. It could be because: 1)it is a hand-me-down; and 2) it is a Dell. My mother-in-law gave it to me and there was no disc with it. She said she couldn't find it and wasn't even sure there was one. I have never hooked up a peripheral like that and not had a disc. Every time I boot up my computer I get some kind of error message related to said all-in-one and I can make it do everything but actually scan. I have to sneak in thru a back door and then I can't manipulate the pictures in any way other than to rotate it.

Where was I going with this? Oh, yeah. In the previous post I had pictures of my James Garfield card. Luckily for me it arrived the day I found out my son was...well he is a lot of things, but right now what he is mostly is grounded. And that card just made me smile. And laugh. And smile some more. And the fact that she took the time to write me that awesome little note inside just but me over the moon. And I no longer wanted to come home and throttle my son. As much.

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

And here is to a Happy 2010 for us all. The first resolution I plan to break is to post more!

James Garfield

Holly Jolly Christmas

It is so hawt up in my house. No, really. My oven has been on all day and it is like 68 degrees in here. I may be dying. Not really, but it's really, really hawt.

I don't even know what I accomplished all day with my oven on. I seem to recall a pumpkin roll. It looked good. Oh, and of course there was the traditional Christmas enchiladas. But I also made the most disgusting oatmeal-butterscotch-cream cheese bars. They are truly dreadful. They looked simple enough; they even called themselves "easy" (don't we all?). But they needed to be pulsed in the food processor and mine was just too small. I tried...really I did. Then I tried the blender and that was a complete disaster. Finally I threw it in the mixmaster and hoped for the best. Well, I didn't get the best, that's for darn sure. Yuck. Finished the night with three pans of chocolate chip cookies...the refrigerator roll kind. Did you know that wax paper smokes really bad in the oven? Well, it does. I ran out of parchment paper and used wax paper instead. And the cookies stuck to it. Must be all that wax. Huh.

Since my younguns are not so young anymore, our Christmas celebrations are already done here. We have a family to-do half a mile from here at the ungodly hour of 9 am. I'm putting a 5 hour stew in my new enamel-coated cast iron dutch oven before we leave so we have a built in excuse to leave after 4 hours, because that's when I need to add the potatoes!

If I knew how to get the pictures off my blackberry I would show you the diamond(esque) earrings my man got me. They are beautamous and they made me cry. Not tear up, mind you; for reals cry. He always gets me the best presents and gives them to me in weird ways so I have no idea what I am getting. A few years ago he got me a satellite radio (that also made me cry) after lecturing me about how he would never pay to listen to the radio. He still doesn't understand it but I listen to that thing all the time. And he has enjoyed it on the few long trips we have taken, too. But these earrings are da bomb. And it shows that he listens to me. Every time I see a rapper or nfl player on tv I remark how unfair it is that a boy has nicer earrings than me. And with these I don't have to worry about losing one (cause I lose a LOT of earrings).

Oh, one last thing. Tonight marks my second successful night of being back in the box of w(h)ine and staying off of fb and just generally not embarrassing myself! Go me!

The Drama, Redux

Well, the drama is back.

I cried most of the day Sunday, but I'm done now.

Now, I'm mad, and that is bad news for The Boy Who Would Lie To His Momma.

When my life starts spiraling out of control I clean. My refrigerator shelves are nice and shiny and de-gunked. My pantry is tidy. I've caught the reins of my life again so this insanity can stop! I hate to clean.

On a bright note, the blog that was supposed to be this one may actually start in January. I got tired of waiting for my friend the Metrosexual to start a blog with me so I started my own. He is getting his wireless internet at the beginning of the year so we may actually get to it! Stay tuned!

Back By Popular Demand

I've been gone...did you miss me?

It's been kind of depressing around here, what with the unenjoyment and everything. But guess who got called out to work this morning. That's right. The Big Man. Yay!

I had another one of my binges last week. Slightly more disastrous than the last one (when am I going to learn to stay off fb when drunk?); luckily I don't really remember much and I've quit digging into the rubble trying to figure out the lost couple of hours. Upside is I have a new keyboard. Says it is spillproof right on the box.

The dog is still sleeping in the house at night, but I don't know how long that is going to last. I awoke this morning (nevermind what time) to find him asleep on the couch. Had his head on the pillow and everything. And that is precisely where I found him when I got home from work tonight.

I am a terrible housekeeper, ya'll. You can't even call what I do--or more accurately what I don't do--housekeeping. But I can NOT have a stinking, drooling 90 pound dog sleeping on my couch.

Even I have my limits.

Except where wine is concerned evidently.